WHY ALWAYS ME?

I used to live in Colorado, but now I live in Providence and post things on the internet sometimes.

Hate mail goes here ill.example@gmail.com or here

You can also harass me on the twitter where I try to make dick jokes and sports jokes and sports dick jokes @illex

I also write about soccer at Avoiding the Drop

Last night we watched American Ninja Warrior, which was not nearly as good as the Japanese version, mostly because the people on the show actually really trained hardcore for the show and weren’t just some unassuming looking Japanese accountant that could climb the side of a building with his pinkies. It was essentially the professional apex for PARKOUR! players? (Parkourers? Parkourists? whatever.). Every one of the stupid ass contestants was a PARKOURIST! and they all had grand dreams of being a stuntman or something equally as worthless, like professional trampoliner. There was even a PARKOUR! gym they all seemed to train at (it exists and it’s as dumb looking as you thought it was). There was even a dude sleeping in his car in LA with dreams of being a stuntman and the king of PARKOUR! or something. I absolutely love is TV shows based upon peoples dreams of fame and glory that don’t result in any fame or glory (or money) except the quasi celebrity you get from other competitors on the show. I’m all about people chasing their dreams (do what you love and all those other cliches people use to justify making $5,000 a year dancing on a street corner dressed like Charlie Chaplin) but like make yourself some realistic dreams you fucking morons. Jumping off of trash cans is of no interest to anyone except other idiots who like to jump off of trashcans. I’ll probably keep watching because it’s on at a weird time when nothing else is on, and because it’s kind of fun watching people who’s life’s work gets crushed when they can’t catch a cargo net. I give American Ninja Warrior 3.5 back flips off of a park bench out of 5 back flips off of a park bench

Last night we watched American Ninja Warrior, which was not nearly as good as the Japanese version, mostly because the people on the show actually really trained hardcore for the show and weren’t just some unassuming looking Japanese accountant that could climb the side of a building with his pinkies. It was essentially the professional apex for PARKOUR! players? (Parkourers? Parkourists? whatever.). Every one of the stupid ass contestants was a PARKOURIST! and they all had grand dreams of being a stuntman or something equally as worthless, like professional trampoliner. There was even a PARKOUR! gym they all seemed to train at (it exists and it’s as dumb looking as you thought it was). There was even a dude sleeping in his car in LA with dreams of being a stuntman and the king of PARKOUR! or something.

I absolutely love is TV shows based upon peoples dreams of fame and glory that don’t result in any fame or glory (or money) except the quasi celebrity you get from other competitors on the show. I’m all about people chasing their dreams (do what you love and all those other cliches people use to justify making $5,000 a year dancing on a street corner dressed like Charlie Chaplin) but like make yourself some realistic dreams you fucking morons. Jumping off of trash cans is of no interest to anyone except other idiots who like to jump off of trashcans.

I’ll probably keep watching because it’s on at a weird time when nothing else is on, and because it’s kind of fun watching people who’s life’s work gets crushed when they can’t catch a cargo net. I give American Ninja Warrior 3.5 back flips off of a park bench out of 5 back flips off of a park bench

  1. davidroy said: I came across it last night, having no context. Was very surprised at the overt PARKOUR! flavor of it. And, also surprised that Johnny Moseley still gets tv work.
  2. retrotrash reblogged this from illustratedexample and added:
    I didn’t want to watch this last night but my boyfriend made me for 2 agonizing hours. This sums it up.
  3. leeleeleelee replied:
  4. illustratedexample posted this