Dear Kanyo, Karl Welzein here, aka K-Money, which is my name on the streets. Good to see you’re back on the scene and feelin’ well. Last time I heard, you were bein’ a world class corncob, but hey, we all make mistakes and it’s not fair to hold a brother to his past. A few ticks back I took alot of static for makin’ a bm behind the dumpster at work. People still try to kick knowledge about it, but it’s old news, blood. Anyway, thought I’d reach out, guy to guy, and see if you’d like me on your supermind team. I got creativity by the buttload! (Ha! just some bathroom guy humor there) I’ve just had so many ideas that could make the world a bolder place: McWing Sammies at Mickey D’s, mucho off the chain flavor bowls, and Captain Karl’s Pizza Ship, which I think you’d be down with. See, Captain Karl’s would be an equal opportunity employer for blacks, whites, everything really. You just need healthy chest beefers to be a busty sea wench waitress, or to work on time to wash the dishes in our after school program for minorities. I have a dream, Kanyo, and that dream is for all colors to enjoy the bold flavors of buy 11 get one free Top Shelf Margs together in peace forever. And if you’re steamed that I’m a no good honkey, I gotta lay down that I’m tight with Vernon, Homeless Peanut, and The Cain Train. I care about black people, Kanyo. Represent to the fullest and pour out some 40. And since you’re a rapper, I gotta tell you that I’m down with carnal passions involving big dumpers and crap. We should have a side guy to guy about babes sometime. Oh, I gotta tell you about the new dance called “The Peener.” It’s sweepin’ the nation and I think I’d be mad swag on your next record. Dave came up with The Peener, but I’m the man who’s makin’ it happen from coast to coast. It’s just like George Bernard Shaw said, “If you have a bold flavor, and I have a bold flavor, and we exchange bold flavors, then you and I will still each have one bold flavor. But you have a bold flavor and I have a bold flavor and we share these bold flavors, then each of us will have two bold flavors.” (he said “apples” but who likes those unless you want the runs to get out of something?) Kanyo, get at me dog. Let’s roll, creatively. Regards, Karl “K-Money” Welzein — PS, Kanyo, Think you should change the name of your company from “DONDA” to “CELEBRAISH.” Creatively, it has a more positive feel, you guys.
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I really hope Kanye gives @DadBoner a shot. (via dagotron)
If the bold K Man is in, I’m in too.
